My Bridezilla burst a blood vessel in her eye. She burst a FRIGGIN blood vessel the week of her wedding!!! Why may you ask? Oooh, please let me tell you. It was because she was crying so much from the stress. She worried herself stupid about how perfect her wedding *must* be, that her nightly melt-downs finally caused her to burst a blood vessel. I was the genius to point out how that will be in all of her wedding pictures. *doh*

Note for all future bridesmaids/maids of honor: Don’t ever EVER point out the obvious to the bridezilla. Calm her quickly and efficiently, and never EVER tell her that something could go wrong. I have every intention of having a bottle of booze for the entirety of Saturday to calm her, and well hell, I might as well take a few sips (i.e. gulps) myself. Right? Only 4 more days until this nightmare has officially ended. If I manage to keep myself sane, my Bridezilla sane, and keep the peace in the family…hell I deserve the Nobel Peace Prize. I’m just sayin.

When my time comes to an end
Don’t be sad, don’t you shed one tear
Take me back to the place I love the most
All my best memories were made in my time here

Don’t be sad or broken hearted
Spread my ashes in the shoe department
Everybody knows that’s where I wanna be
Jimmy Choo choo, Saks Fifth Avenue
For all eternity smells like heaven to me, yeah, yeah, yeah

“Going Out in Style” ~Kelli Pickler